Guest Blogger: Andy

April 23, 2015
Day 358

For the past year, Sean has diligently written a blog entry every day.  Many weekends I would tell him to just relax and post something the next day, that no one would notice.  Without fail though, he made sure an entry was always written and posted.  

Today, Sean has turned the reins over to me for a guest blog entry.  I’m very excited that he’s almost done with this project, and honored that he’s asked me to contribute an entry, so let’s see how I do...

As we both approach 40, I’m always amazed at the pace of technology.  Just the concept of a cell phone or a digital camera 20 years ago was abstract and expensive, but today it’s taken for granted.  This makes me curious about the technological singularity that is theorized for the mid-century.  We’ll just have to wait and see where our self-driving cars take us, I suppose.

On a random note, yesterday was Earth Day, which always makes me think about the awful environmental conditions future generations will inherit.  It seems we are developing every conceivable inch of the planet just to satisfy consumer demand for food or products, but I do hope we can reverse this trend at some point.

Today at work is “bring your kids to work day”, one of my favorite days at the office!  Everyone lets their hair down for the day, and we all get free ice cream in the afternoon!

Anyway, I guess I’ll end there.  I’d like to say congratulations to Sean for all the hard work he’s done writing this blog, day after day.  I’m looking forward to seeing it in book form where I can flip through each day, and catch up on all the entries I’ve missed.

Time to make the doughnuts

March 29, 2015
Day 333

For years, I grew up with this guy on my television: the "time to make the doughnuts" guy from Dunkin' Donuts.  I doubt most kids today would have any idea who he is now, the same way they wouldn't recognize the "Where's the beef?" lady, and just how I wouldn't recognize the Maytag Repairman.

Even though this commercial has been gone for years, and I've only seen it referenced in 80s flashback shows once or twice since then, it's really stayed with me, and just came to mind again this morning as I woke up.

I slowly opened my eyes and made a command decision that it was well past time for me to get up and write my blog for the day.  Time to make the doughnuts.

Sadly for you, I have no delicious doughnuts (not even donuts) to treat you with, only this short entry you're reading right now.  My daily blog-writing days are quickly coming to a close, so the responsibility part of this self-made assignment is swiftly approaching its end.  I won't have to worry about getting to the computer each morning and typing out any stories about fish heads, jury duty, sex outdoors, or monastic laundry.  In just another month, the rest of my stories and reflections can wait for their own day to come out once and for all, with or without their own creamy filling.

300 Days In A Row + Announcement

February 24, 2015
Day 300

For 300 days in a row now, I've written an entry in this daily blog, and for 300 days in a row, I've hoped someone might read what I had to say, and possibly even like it on social media (sharing is rare, I know, but always a bonus).

So today, for Day 300 of my 365-day journey from age 39 to age 40, I thought I'd just make a small announcement for the sake of those following along as I'm writing these...

Finishing Forty will be published as my fourth book later this year, sometime in the fall.  50% of all profits from the book in 2015 will also go to my charity of choice, the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention.  More on that later.

If you're reading this in book form, today was the day I made it official, and I hope you've enjoyed paging through these many different entries.  The good news, for both reader and writer alike, is that we have just 65 of these left now.  Though I truly love to write, the pressure of keeping this up EVERY SINGLE DAY has been difficult to say the least, especially on busy work days when I try my best to squeeze it in quickly between jobs, or on weekend mornings when I'm watching TV and sipping coffee, only to jump up and realize I haven't blogged yet.

SOOOOO, thank you for reading along, and thank you for all the link-clicking, post-liking, and post-sharing you all do.  I genuinely appreciate every one of you very, very much!  Thank you!!!

Expecting nothing, and it's awesome!

January 22, 2015
Day 267

Okay, so there's no such thing as nothing on a free day, so I don't actually expect nor desire complete nothingness this coming weekend, but as far as weekends go, the one upcoming looks pretty open.

Last weekend I packed up Christmas decorations and put them back into storage, then had a wake in the Bronx on Sunday.  The weekend before, I took all the Christmas decorations down, which was its own large task.  And the weekend before that was New Year's weekend, which though slow, had its own this-and-that going on.

But this weekend?  The one upcoming?  I've got nothing.  Nada.  Zilch.  I'm going to do a minimum amount of necessary housework and enjoy a maximum amount of rest and relaxation.  I hope to do a lot of writing too, but that's become a passion, and doesn't feel like work.  So yeah, I'm expecting nothing from this weekend, and if nothing's what I get, that would be absolutely awesome!

Flat Tired

(photo from web)

January 21, 2015
Day 266

Today begins the last 100 days of this blog series (thank God), and as if right on cue, I got a flat tire last night on my way home from the gym.

It was dark.  It was cold.  I was in shorts.  The tire was very clearly broken beyond repair, thanks to a pothole the size of Germany, and it just completely deflated me as much as the tire.

Murphy showed up with his Law too, because not only was it nighttime, but it was a poorly lit area too, and my cell phone was almost out of battery, so it cast very little light on the situation.  The lug nuts were either factory sealed on or otherwise rusted tight (it seemed they were both), so as I stepped on the wrench to take them off, the metal only pushed through the soft rubber bottom of my sneakers.  I had to change into my brown work shoes (while still in shorts, though I wasn't too concerned with fashion at the moment), and they finally helped me pry the lug nuts off.

The whole process took me approximately 45 minutes, four phone calls, and three texts to complete, but complete it I finally did, and got home safe on the donut I keep in the trunk.  How did I do it?  Because I'd done it before at least twice.  Much like Harry Potter conjuring his Patronus, I remembered I could do it, so I did.

That's life then too, isn't it?  We do more than we think we can or want to do because we've had to before.  The older we get, the wiser we supposedly get, and things just become part of the game.

State of the Blog(ger)

January 16, 2015
Day 261
-3.6, 52,465
(To be updated now each Friday. The first number is pounds lost since early January, and the second number is words written in Book 3.)

The blog has been getting a lot of views lately, and the blogger wishes to thank the world for that fact.  He doesn't know why he's speaking in third person, but hopes to rectify that situation by the second paragraph. 

Next week I'll hit Day 265, which means I'm 100 days away from turning 40, and just as importantly, it means I'll have only 100 more of these blog entries to write!  I'm very proud of myself for what I've achieved here the past eight and a half months, but you better believe I will LOVE being done with it too!  Writing a blog entry every single day is so much work!

Speaking of weight loss, last week I weighed myself for the first time in months, and was quite perturbed at the number staring back up at me.  Thankfully, I weighed in again last night, and I'm down 3.6 pounds already, so I feel a bit better.  I have 15 pounds to lose still to get back to my goal weight/low adult weight, and I plan to accomplish this before my 40th birthday on May 1st.

Speaking of book writing, that's been going VERY well for me lately too.  Right now I'm on page 142 and have 52,465 words written.  I'm about to start writing Chapter 15 of a 37-chapter book, so I still have a long road ahead of me, but the story is now coming together very well.  Copious notes and outline work have really helped me on this project.  As you might imagine, writing one book is work enough without it being the third and final book of a trilogy, where you need to resolve all topics and characters, and answer as many questions as possible.

So yeah, life is good, blogging's good, book writing's good, and my weight loss is good!  Plus today is Friday--Chipotle Day!--so the blogger believes he is a very happy camper.  ...oh, shit.

Day 200

November 16, 2014
Day 200

For 200 days straight, I've been assaulting inundating blessing you every day with my words.  The longer I write this daily blog, the more difficult it is at times to come up with creative ideas, so by all means, if you happen to be reading this LIVE, as I share them between May 1st 2014 and May 1st 2015, please let me know what you'd like to see more of from me.  No guarantees, but I'm all ears!

For the next 165 days or so, I have a bunch of ideas already roasting in my head.  I turn them over like marshmallows over a flame, waiting for them to just begin to brown before I release them on you, though sometimes, I don't even get that far.  Sometimes the idea just pops to mind, and I rush to the nearest keyboard to click away until the idea is out.

I'm toying with the idea of allowing a few guest bloggers here too.  Would that be cheating?

I think I'd still end up typing a few sentences for each one if I did that, and it would provide a unique perspective.  Of course I'd have each person sign a contract stating I can make millions of dollars off their words without any legal recourse, but I'll let my man Luc work out the language.

Besides that, I still have some dating stories to share, more Publishers Clearing House adventures to entertain you with, and definitely some tales from the monastery that have never been told before, which are just waiting to be finally unleashed upon the world once and for all!

Happy 200, Finishing Forty, you're lookin' good so far!

So how's everything?

This happens all the time in my house. :)

November 9, 2014
Day 193

"So how's everything?"  I get asked this all the time, and I'm sure you've been asked this too many times.  We always give a short answer, maybe really, really short like, "Fine," hoping the person will move on to the next person or topic quickly.  Other times, we'll give a slightly longer answer that might include something about our pet, or house, or job. 

Today I thought I'd just give the significantly longer answers to this question, just in case anyone out there is wondering.  I'm doing this under topics though, so you can jump around however you'd like.

So how's work?
It's fine.  Usual.  I like my job a lot, I like my boss and coworkers a lot, and I'm happy to live so close to work.

So how's writing?
Amazing actually, thanks for asking.  I write my Finishing Forty blog every single day, and now throughout November, I'm participating in NaNoWriMo, which stands for National Novel Writing Month.  I'm already almost 50% done, which means I've got almost 25,000 words written, and about 50 pages of a Word document completely filled.  I'm very excited!  My third book, the last of the Heaven, Hell, and the Planet In Between series, is on hold just for this month, but I'll get back to it soon.  I've got almost 100 pages of that done now, about 40,000 words' worth, so that's going great so far too.

So how's Andy?
He's good.  You know, the usual.  He and I are going down to D.C. next weekend to visit his Uncle Nilo and buy some of his paintings, so we're looking forward to that, and Andy's flying down to North Carolina for Thanksgiving weekend.  His mom's brother just died about a month ago, so Andy will be with his parents for the holiday, which will be nice.  I'll go and visit his aunt up here on Thanksgiving too.  All's good though.

So how's life?
Life is good.  I can't complain.  Well, I could, but I won't.  I've got plenty of good in my life, so I try not to think too much about the bad.  I mean, I do, but not too often, you know?  So yeah, life is good.

So how's the diet going?
Ugh.  Well, I mean, it's going, and I'm trying hard, but I lost three weeks this summer when my back, knee, and foot were all hurting at the same time, and then I lost two or three weeks because of the wakes, funerals, and jury duty time.  But I'm back at the gym now, and really trying hard to keep working at it all.  It's a constant battle, you know?  I'm starting a Pilates class this week or next too, so I'm really looking forward to that.

So how's the house?
The house is good.  I have to pull down the Halloween decorations now and at least take out the Christmas stuff, even if I don't put it all up yet.  It takes forever to do, so I might start it a little this week before we go away, I'm not sure.  We haven't done any major or even minor projects in a while, so I think I'm due for some projects or renovations right after the holidays.

What about you?  How are you doing?

We take on too much...

I hate memes with errors, but I liked this one enough to use anyway.

November 3, 2014
Day 187

"I take on too much."  "I make my life more difficult than it needs to be."  "I don't pretend to have the busiest life of all, or even the most stressful life of all my closest friends and family, but I do very often find myself surrounded by more stress than needed."

If any of this sounds familiar, you might be an idiot, like me. 

God knows life is stressful enough without making things any more difficult for ourselves, and yet so many of us take on much more than we should.  Whether it's babysitting for your grandkids, running to the supermarket for a friend, or just agreeing to host something at your house, we all do this all the time.  We see what's doable and comfortable, and then we purposely stretch the parameters of our comfort level.

Why?!   Why the hell do we do this to ourselves?!

I think there's a part of us that says, "Challenges are just life's way of proving how great I am."  We take on a new challenge like a fireman takes on a new fire alarm.  We jump to the aid of others, even though we've got our own fires to put out back home.  And very often, these challenges are completely avoidable, too.  We offer our help or services, even when the person asking could easily get someone else to do it. 

For me, I'm often asked to help out with writing or proofreading work for free.  I enjoy helping people, but there are times when I simply cannot do it.  I've already got too much going on, and even if I could squeeze out an hour or more to help someone, I don't feel like it.  I want to finish my 8-hour workday and just relax, not work on a second or third project for someone else.

Do I want to help people?  Of course!  But sometimes, I just can't handle it, and I truly hope people will understand that.  I put an awful lot of guilt on my own shoulders, so I don't need anyone else offering me any more. 

In my personal writing work, I'm doing these blog entries every morning, and then throughout November, I'm participating in NaNoWriMo (off to a great start, by the way).  That's 2,000 words a day though right there (1600-something words a day for NaNoWriMo + 400-something on average in these blog entries).  You try it!  I enjoy these kinds of challenges, but that doesn't make them easy.

And again, especially to all those mothers and strugglers of all kinds out there, I do not mean to compete with you for who's stressed out more.  I simply vent and write this here to sympathize with your plight, and hope you'll do the same for me.  I take on too much, and many of you take on too much too.  So let's all just try not to do that so much in the future!  Let's try to just understand that our friends and family members often have a lot on their plates too, and won't be able to do everything we need them to do. 

Agreed?  Good!

If you think someone needs this reminder, give them a gentle hint
by sharing this on your social media!

HALFWAY THERE!

October 30, 2014
Day 183

I'm now halfway done with this year-long experiment.  For the past six months, I have documented every single day of my life with a blog reflection.  Some have been about my past experiences, some have been about the adventures (good and bad) I'm going through in the present, and others have just been about completely random topics.

I've tried hard to create a variety for my readers, because I know you're out there reading all the time.  Thank you!!!

Each day, I start the same way.  I stare at the screen, and think of what to write about.  On some days, it may be obvious: a funeral, jury duty, a special occasion or holiday, or perhaps just the anniversary of a special event in my life.  Other days, I think about what's going on in the world, or what the universe might be screaming at me to write on, and I begin to form that initial thought into a full reflection. 

Sometimes I preach, sometimes I teach, and sometimes I just screech a lot like a barn owl.  No matter what my approach is, I always look at how many views the blog got.  I don't freak out when a blog entry only gets a small number of views, and I don't celebrate too much when one becomes very popular, but I do sincerely focus on what entries seem to be more popular than others.  It helps me always write with you in mind!

And so today, I've reached the halfway point.  This is Day 183 in what will probably be a 366-day journey (ending on my 40th birthday next year).  I've tried very hard to make this interesting for you, and I hope you're enjoying it so far.  For those reading this as I write it and post it live each day, please know I appreciate all comments you give me very much! 

It's impossible for a writer to keep his demons completely out of mind, to completely dismiss the voices that seem to scream, "No one cares about you or your writing!"  So for those who let me know they read something, I thank you!  I truly appreciate you and your time very, very much!

Three reflections

October 24, 2014
Day 177

I had a long day today, but wrote these reflections this morning, and offer them now.

Reflection 1
I live my life publicly, especially this year throughout my daily blog-writing experience, but that isn't to say I don't also have enough material in between blog entries to fill a book or two.  Perhaps I will one day write such a book, filled with all the otherwise unspeakable moments, the times in between the times, the times before and after the blog entries and reflections.  I don't mean to infer I've got some vast underworld of darkness and awful behavior I never write about, because I don't, but I think we all have interesting little stories all the time we'd rather not disperse to the public.

Reflection 2
I've known plenty of people who died in their 60s and 70s, but at no point do I recall talking with any of them in their late 50s about what they planned to do with the last 10-15 years of their life.  We all tell ourselves we'll live until 80 or 90, if not longer, but experience shows me that most of us simply do not.

Reflection 3
Serving jury duty is a unique experience that cannot be easily compared with any other in life.  In that way it is very clearly a true life experience, a vital thread of the whole fabric of our lives, and is quite honestly a very helpful one too.  Those who never serve jury duty may still have all the ability and experience of a full and thorough life, but by serving this civic duty, you receive a stipend from life itself.  You are handed, in a manner of speaking, course credits you can obtain no where else in the university of human experience.

Day 100

It never ends (yet).

August 8, 2014
Day 100

For a hundred days in a row now, I've shared a daily reflection with you on this blog.  And for a hundred days in a row now, part of me has not really enjoyed the self-made requirement very much at all.

Regardless, I've done it, and for that fact alone, I'm quite proud of myself.  For the record, it's taught me a few very valuable life lessons:

1) The more I write, the better I write.  I'm just teaching myself through this process how to be a better blog writer, a better article writer, and just a better writer overall.  The more I write, the more I learn how to manage my craft, my time, my desire, and my inspiration.  And I think I'm doing pretty well so far!

My internet and all of our servers were down there at work the other day,
so I mapped out what my blog entries will be about each day
between now and September 6th.

2) With just a few minutes of careful thought, you can come up with a whole slew of interesting topics for blogs or any other writing adventure.

3) Blogging makes you a more honest person.  Unlike social networks, where you feel forced to conform within a few lines of life-sharing, blogging asks much more of you.  Soul bearing is not just rewarding in this process, but quite required, too.

4) And finally, it's taught me that under no circumstances will I ever want to do this again.  It's going to be something I'll look back on and appreciate very, very much, but it's also something I will be absolutely thrilled to be done with once it's over!

So that's it.  Today is number 100, which is awesome!  I've come so far! 

And yet,  because this will take me until May 1st next year, I still have another 265 left!  Yikes!!!!!!! 

Thanks for reading along!  Your views, likes, and comments are all very much appreciated! : )

50 days straight

June 19, 2014.
          Day 50/365

No, the title of this piece is not some sort of challenge to my sexuality.  Sorry, ladies!

My daily writing journey has wound its way through 50 different reflections in the past 50 days now, and there are still hundreds of these left before I'm done. 

WHAT HAVE I GOTTEN MYSELF INTO?!

I tell my partner Andy how I'm doing from time to time, and on at least two occasions now he's suggested, "Why don't you just skip a day or two?" 

Whenever he says something like this, I usually look at him as if a giant rabbit has just crawled out of his ear.  I thinking about saying, "Get behind me, you Satan!" but usually I just opt for something lighter like, "No, I can't stop now!"  He rolls his eyes at me, and gives me the Marge Simpsonesque, "Okaaayyy".  You know the one.  Whenever Homer says he's gonna do something crazy, but Marge wants to be supportive anyway?  Yeah, that's Andy's completely understandable reaction to me in this situation!

What I have decided though is, some entries can be shorter.  I don't need to go on as long as I usually do (even though I still think they're pretty short).  But for the sake of my brain, and to give myself just a little break, I choose to celebrate this 50th entry by keeping this one short, and stopping... right... here! :)