Dieting Stress

January 23, 2015
Day 268
-3, 56,841 (+4376)

On Tuesday evening, on my way home from the gym (this detail cannot be stressed enough), I got a flat tire.  When I got home, I wanted to eat A LOT of comfort food.  Instead, I did not.  Win.

On Wednesday evening, after going to the gym (just to clarify), I went to the supermarket on an empty stomach.  I spent some time staring at the ice cream and the cookies, but I didn't buy anything other than the one loaf of bread I needed.  Win.

On Thursday evening, after finishing my workouts for the week (mm-hm), happy to have just one more workday ahead of me, and stressed over the busy week at work I've had, I wanted to celebrate or otherwise treat myself.  I did not.  Win.

On Friday morning, just three hours ago as I write this, I did my weekly weigh-in, telling myself as long as the scale read a certain lower number I had in mind (just slightly below where I was last week), I'd be happy.  I stepped on, said my serenity prayer once again with meaning, and looked down.  It said I had gained .6 pounds since last week.  I laughed, stepped off, moved the scale, tossed my head back with a giggle, and stepped on again.  The number did not change.  I tried a third time, no longer smiling, and then stepped off and took a moment to myself.  Loss.

I tell myself with the amount of jogging I do on the elliptical, my leg muscles have just built up a bit now, and the plateau is only temporary.  I tell myself these things happen, through no fault of my own, and I shouldn't be discouraged.  And then I tell myself to eat a lot of food.

For those who don't diet or exercise, I know you don't get it.  I do.  I understand you just don't comprehend how difficult it is for some of us.  I also know that as much as I'd like to slap some of you when you say things like, "just eat less", that I should not actually become violent.  But please do at least understand that for many of us who try to stay fit or attain fitness and better health, we genuinely are trying hard--and we're having these setbacks quite often anyway.  It's not easy, but we try our best...to stay sane.