Day 270
Marvin was the senior proofreader at Publishers Clearing House, and though he was thoroughly a character in many ways, he was also a sweet man who helped me very much while I was there.
He lived alone in an apartment not far from the company, so he could easily walk to work when the weather was good, and he always walked to temple. Living alone was the life he lived, and it seemed to be the life he wanted too, but it may have proven to be his downfall in the end.
We came into work one day and heard the story: he was found earlier that morning on the floor of the men's room at work, having suffered what was either a stroke or a heart attack or both the night before. He was still conscious, and seemed happy to see the person who found him, but within a day or two in the hospital, he died.
Marvin was a very simple man, barely computer literate, and nothing about him and technology went well together. So when we got to the funeral and realized it was being live streamed online, we couldn't believe it. Marvin of all people had the most technologically advanced funeral any of us had ever seen!
At the cemetery, it came as something of a surprise to find out I would have to help bury Marvin. In Orthodox Jewish tradition, the loved ones of the deceased do as much of the work as they can themselves. So even though there was a small group of men standing by who had just dug the grave, we had to do everything else. We carried his coffin in between tight turns through a very compact cemetery, and then we had to slowly lower the coffin ourselves into the hole. After that, we had to shovel all of the dirt in on top of the coffin ourselves until most of the entire 6 feet worth of space was all filled up!
I think about Marvin on a fairly frequent basis, and I still feel the profound connection I have to him because of the role I played in his burial. (Side note: all three of us from work who helped the rabbi bury Marvin were subsequently laid off from the company. At least we all knew we could find work as gravediggers anytime.)
I buried a man with my own two hands, and the experience is one I'll never forget. I submit this reflection here, like so many others I've already shared, to look at my own life experiences and learn from them. What did I learn most of all from this one? I mentioned before that Marvin's living alone may have been his downfall, and I don't mean that in any sort of judgmental way. The security officer at work was subsequently fired for not realizing Marvin was in the building so late. He was supposed to have checked all the offices and restrooms, and apparently never did.
Living alone can be dangerous. If something happens to you, there's no one nearby who would know about it for a while. So many people do live alone, of course, but I guess I just mention this as a reminder to at least have someone you text before bed, if nothing else. Marvin's death reminds me to keep my cell phone on me at all times when Andy's not home. A bathroom trip, a trip to another level of my house: I always keep it close, just in case I fall or am struck by something and can't move from where I am. Obviously, there are no guarantees in life, and sometimes bad things just happen without any way of avoiding them, but we should protect ourselves whenever we can.
Missing you, Marvin, and look forward to seeing you again one day!
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